~ Wish you all the best ~

It's been quite a long time since i last updated my blog. Too many feelings, too many things had happened..I wanted to cry, but somehow, something, someone, hold back my tears.

Since the last message, since the last goodbye, we never contact again. Our story had come to an end, and i know it's time to let go and bit goodbye. It's really hard for me. Somehow, during that time, i wish he can say something to bring us back together, but, he din't. And from then, i know, he wanted this to happened. I appreciate the happy times we had been together. The ups and downs, and the tears and laughter we had shared together...

I know, i have to let go. I admit, i felt heartache, struggling to make this decision. But, i understand clearly, i'm not the one he love anymore. Since months ago. Since that day, when i was neglected, since the day i cried and felt helpless the most. My dear friend knew me best. She had accompanied me all this while. I'm too, very happy that, she support me with this decision. Thanks my dear..

Anyway, i wish him all the best, in everything, in every aspect. I really wish that we're friends, but i know, it's impossible. I hope he's happy, with what had happened..

::kuanru:: signing off *don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened*

~ Ain't the same ANYMORE ~

Once, doing this is against my principal, but now, i'm doing it. My friend once told me, live happily NOW!! I, will, look forward. I'm going to live for myself, and not for others. I'm doing this because i'm happy with it. I'm really happy with it. OK??

::kuanru:: signing off

~ At last.. ~

At last, i drop my tears. At last, i let my heart out. I've cried to sleep. All this while, i thought i'm strong enough, to manage everything myself. But, i'm wrong. I thought i'm tough, but actually i'm so weak, very weak. I kept everything to myself. All the problems, all the sadness, i kept it deep inside myself, seldom did i portray it. All this while, i wear a smile on my face, to cover all the sadness inside me.

Listen to songs in my lappie. Every songs remind me of you. Every songs have a story behind. Every songs are my favourite. You know me best of what songs i like.

But now, it seems like you are so far away. Every now and then, these songs accompanied me throughout the restless nights, whenever when i'm overloaded with stress.

How can I go on alone?

::kuanru:: signing off

~Thanks for E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G.~

I've met alot of people. Different types of people. Each of them i believe wears a mask to hide their hideous self, to get acceptance from others. I can't deny that, most of the time, i do wear masks. Infront of different people i wore different mask to portray myself. Sometimes, i get tired and i even wondered, who am i actually. Is this what i want? Why should i hide myself from them? Why should i be afraid of them? I have what they have, i might have more than they do. People influence people. Thats what the world is all about. I've learnt a lesson that never trust someone so easily. The one that you trust the most hurts you most deeply. Some people might twist the fact infront of you and infront of others, if you all get what i mean..

Anyway, there's this someone i would like to thank. I really appreciate him for coming into my life. Tho' there're lots of misunderstanding every now and then, lots of tears, sadness and dissapointments, but when i look back, it's just a minor problem and shouldn't fuss about it. I even felt that i'm so childish for behaving as such. He had been so, so patient to me.

Infront of him, i'm me. just me.
Infront of him, i don't have to wear on the mask.
Infront of him, i can talk about everything. Everything that i want to.
He knows me very well. I heart him. Really..

Will miss you.. ~ Thank you for being such a darling!! ~

::kuanru:: signing off *i heart jay*

~L.O.V.E.~

i was just hopping from one blog to another, as usual, i loves reading blogs, i love to see how people writes, the feelings of people, and how people react in a certain way. As i was hopping from one blog to another, i found one of my classmate's blog. Joanne's. Every word that she wrote give me some new inspiration, her words were full with feelings and meaning. Furthermore, there was this music keep on playing that i don't wish to stop.

Love, for some people, might be tough, but for others, it might be as sweet as candies. We always see 'forever love', 'love you forever', etc. everywhere, printed on the cups, cards, pillow, you name it. But, how many love will last Forever? Will everyone have a happily ever after ending as in Sleeping Beauty or Cinderella?

Love is complicated. I agree. It can make you feel like you're the best in the world, it can also makes you feel like you're even worst and useless than a trash. But, people still love the feelings of being in love. There are bitter and sweet, just like chocolate, bitter and sweet, but still people love chocolate.

However, love really can change a whole lot of people, from physical to mental, or even from good to bad. Me, personally, love the feelings of being in love. Sometimes, it gives me bad time too. But, overall, it's sweet.. :)

~What guys need to know about girls~

As stated above, 'What guys need to know about girls?'

Guys, when this question is throw to you, what would you answer? I've done some obervation and survey on this title, although it's not done scientifically as what i've learn in research methods with hypothesis, literature review, so on. But, among my friends, i mean guys, when they were asked about this, they will probably said, 'girls, complicated..mafan..kepo..mood like weather, change easily..therefore, not easy to understand' true enough that girls don't watch football or be so cincai like most of the guys do.. what a girl wants is really simple (after my observation) *ehhem*

What a girl wants is just attention, and care. Maybe you might be wondering, doesn't i give her enough? isn't she greedy? most of the time, attention, cares and love are not enough. Just like money..you'll never stop asking for more, right? I just simply think that, girls need to be reassured that they are being love. Hugs, smses, phone calls can make them feel more secured.

Girls, do tell me if i'm wrong k?

*A book to recommend if you wanna know about guys and girls relationship : Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

Thanks, Thanks and Thanks

I, hereby, would like to send my special thanks to my bf, Jay, who have been so kind to be with me when i'm facing problems, when i nearly broke down, when i nearly wanted to give up. Although he might not shower me with pressies, cash, or credit cards, *ehhem*, but he truly shower and flooded me with love and care. If this is just a dream, i rather don't want to wakeup. He's always be there for me when i'm down, when i really need him. He might not be perfect, but, who on earth is PERFECT?? I truly appreciate everything he'd done for me..

U EVOL I!!

This is a post specially dedicated to my bf.. those who aren't interested can just skip or roll down..nyehehehe...

~what a girl wants?~

One day,

Boy: Dear, where would you like to have your dinner?

Girl: Anywhere you like dear.

Boy: How about char kuey tiao?

Girl: char kuey tiao? don't you think it's too oily? *wondering*

Boy: Then, where would you like to eat? *still very patient*

Girl: Anything will do la...

Boy: How about chicken rice?

Girl: *hmm* Too much of calories...

Boy: What's on your mind then? *starting to become impatient*

Girl: I really don't know.

Boy: Then just tell me when you have something in mind!! *angry*

Familiar with the situation above? I, sometimes can be the girl above, which i think if i were the boy, i'll get angry too.. *hmmm* --sometimes, girls are unpredictable, true?

Today is Valentines!!
Love is in the air!!
Who will be my Valentines??

Happy Valentines Day!!!!!!!